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心理落差 [复制链接]

Rank: 8Rank: 8

发表于 2013-4-27 14:55:50 |显示全部楼层
作者:  爱尔兰UCD 赖小琪
今晚是平安夜, 明天就是圣诞节了. 然而在这个西方国家最盛大的节日里, 我却没有太多的喜悦, 只是把它当成是一种平常的日子来看待. 雪下个不停, 外面厚厚的积雪让我望而生畏, 本来想出去走走, 顺便买些东西, 但是最后还是不想出去, 宁愿留在宿舍看看书和一些专业期刊文章. 放假前向别的专业的同学借了好几本厚厚的书, 那是他们的专业课教材, 想趁这个假期把它们看完. 并且还上了学校的网上图书馆下载了一些感兴趣的和国际商务有关的文章来看. 昨晚接到一个美国朋友的电话, 他说我太拼命了, 叫我不要给自己太大的压力. 其实我也没有他想的严重, 我只是想趁最后这段学习的时间多看一点书. 不然明年工作了就没有这么多时间了.
这几天收到了超多的祝福邮件, 特别是今天, 整整有八十多封! 另外QQ留言更是多得不得了. 这些邮件和留言全是以前的同学朋友, 还有很多深大的师弟师妹发过来的, 真的让我很感动!! 看来虽然我离开深大了, 可是大家还没有忘记我, 特别是以前参加过英语角的同学. 在国外生活得越久, 我越怀念以前在深圳的生活. 我总是有意无意地把这里生活的方方面面和深圳对比, 最后得出一个结论: 这里除了人比深圳的人热情, 除了环境比深圳好点, 没有一样比得上深圳的!
除了一些客观的因素, 我自己的主观因素可能也是我想回深圳的原因. 经过四年的大学生活, 我在深圳建立了很大的人际关系网, 不管是在深大里面还是在外面, 都有很多朋友. 以前生活虽然很忙碌, 但是不会有彷徨感, 一切都是这么的有条不紊. 那时候天天忙着上课学习, 还要兼顾外面的工作, 虽然很累, 但是很充实, 起码自己会赚钱, 没什么经济压力, 想买什么就买什么. 另外还要还要每周日主持英语角, 帮BEC的考生的伙伴, 解答他们的疑问, 还要和同学朋友聚会聚餐, 真的忙得不得了. 每天的日程都是安排得满满的, 从早上睁一眼的那一刻起, 我就知道自己接来下要做什么了. 清晨打开手机, 它经常震个不停, 有好多信息. 一天下来, 每天的信息量都是过百的, 都是同学朋友或者师弟师妹发来询问各种东西像雅思啊, BEC啊, 托福啊, 出国的一些文案准备啊, 等等, 或者是约我某个时间出来吃饭或者喝东西. 一般那些信息如果不紧急的话, 我都不会立即回复, 以免耽搁了我的行程. 我都会统一晚上11点左右抽出十几二十分钟的时间在飞信上逐个回复. 真的很感谢移动发明了飞信, 不然我真怕自己的手机会被按爆了.
QQ也是一样, 只要一上线, 就闪个不停, 而我经常只是挂Q让别人传东西给我, 或者我传东西给别人, 一般都是在忙碌或者离开状态, 所以不能及时回复信息. 都是最后统一抽时间逐个回复的. QQ邮箱更加不用说了, 一天下来至少也是几十封, 遇到忙着, 特别是BEC考试前两周, 考生们都在找口语伙伴时, 都跑来问我一些情况, 邮箱天天都上百封邮件, 看到我心惊胆颤. 我记得大三下学期BEC考前的一天, 邮件量达到历史新高, 那天居然有212封邮件, 足足让我回复了差不多两个小时. 由于邮件如此多, 所以我一般都是长话短说, 问题复杂的我都会叫发邮件的人给我电话. 至于手机, 我那时一看到手机震动就烦, 而且也经常在忙, 所以很多电话也未能及时接听. 有时上一下厕所回来也有五六个未接来电. 我当时望着自己的手机会想: 我究竟是不是变成国家主席了? 不然为什么忙成这样?
那时候, 别人想约我出来吃个饭或者喝点东西也不容易. 要是有人想请我出来吃饭, 都要提前一周预约, 有时甚至要提前两周, 因为一般来讲, 我未来七天的计划都定了下来, 改不了的. 有时就算和朋友约好了某一天晚上到海岸城某个饭店吃饭, 最后也会因为我的事情而一推再推, 甚至推迟了一个多月. 结果这引起了很多同学朋友的 “不满”, 在邮件里经常向我 “抱怨”. 记得去年我的好朋友黄洋约我去他家吃饭, 我答应了周日去的. 可是想不到周日那天培训班的一个老师请假了, 我要去代她上课, 结果只能和他重新约定时间: 下一个周日. 可是到了下一个周日又因为各种事情不能去了, 只能再约定: 下一个周日吧. 结果推了好几个星期, 最后他跑到我上课的地方, 趁下课的时候进去课室找我, 苦笑地对我说: “赖小琪啊, 怎么请你吃个饭也比登天还难!” 我当时还半开玩笑地说: “是啊,正是因为难所以才珍贵啊, 哈哈.”
到了大四第二个学期, 也就是今年的3月到7月这段时间, 可是说是我大学四年学业最轻松的一个学期了. 一般别的同学都没课了, 只有我这个修双学位的人才要上两门课. 但是比起以前好几个学期的35个学分, 那时已经是最轻松的了. 那时除了忙一下申请出国的东西, 也没有什么特别的事情. 那个学期也是我应酬最多的时候. 那时我本以为会有足够的时间来陪朋友 “吃喝玩乐”, 弥补以前对他们的愧疚. 然而我压根也没想到, 在我的人生, 时间永远是不够的. 那几个月真的经常 “夜夜笙歌”, 宿舍前面桂庙的所有火锅店先是吃了一遍, 然后锁定其中一家比较好的再经常和形形色色的朋友光顾; 以前由于没时间很少去海岸城那边吃东西, 在那几个月里居然去了十几二十次. 就连九月初即将出国时, 有一个很好的朋友说要为我送行, 也专门过去那边的新桃园酒店吃了一顿. 说实话海岸城真的是美食的天堂, 呵呵. 自助餐厅去的更多, 估计在那几个月里没有十五次也有十次了. 至于唱K, 因为有慢性咽炎, 而且平时经常在外面教英语和做翻译, 所以不敢过分高歌, 顶多小声唱几句, 呵呵. 然而就算我安排这么多时间来社交, 依然还有很多人的约会我没能应约. 比如说七月初黄海陪我去买笔记本电脑, 帮我讨价还价, 弄了一个晚上买成了, 本来和他说好要请他好好吃顿饭的, 可是后面终究没有时间, 真的感到无比愧疚!
其实要是说我整天都在忙碌, 也是假的. 我也有自己休息的时间. 外面有外面的精彩, 可是独处也有独处的快乐. 有时经常在外面应酬和交流, 会感到很累很累, 所以我也会时不时抽几天时间留给自己,  一个人静静地在宿舍好好休息, 看看电视剧, 看看国家地理频道, 听听音乐, 吃一堆水果零食, 再就是睡个好觉. 特别是今年夏天, 我中午都不会和别人出去吃饭, 我都是叫外卖, 然后在宿舍一边吃一边看电视. 因为天气实在太热了, 而且我容易过敏, 所以我不想出去, 连饭堂也不想走. 吃饱了, 看一会电视就午睡, 睡它一两个小时, 养好精神晚上出去应酬朋友. 那种感觉可能是我大学四年以来最舒服的了, 呵呵.
但是我来了爱尔兰以后, 一切都变了, 彻底地变了. 我再也没有在深大时的优越感, 也没有认识很多朋友, 学习困难的陡增以及人际关系网的急剧缩小, 让我的心理落差相当大, 所以天天就好像坐牢一样压抑. 手机再也不响了, 也没有什么信息了, 好像变得可有可无. 邮箱里虽然也有不少邮件, 可是与以前相比, 简直是九牛一毛. 下课以后, 除了无休止的作业, 我再也没什么应酬. 在刻苦学习感到充实之余, 一种空前的落寞感也向心头袭来. 更惨的是, 在这边没有了兼职, 所以没有了收入, 经济压力特别大. 以前在商场买东西是想吃什么就买什么, 从来不会心痛钱, 可是现在我可是精打细算, 能省则省. 我想要是以前了解我的朋友来了这边看到我买东西货比三家的情景, 肯定笑得合不拢嘴. 以前在深圳经常去各种各样的餐厅吃饭, 可是现在我再也不敢轻易踏入那些餐厅, 因为随便吃一顿可能也要花掉我一个星期的生活费. 以前别人的邀请我是能推就推, 现在是没有什么人来邀请我了. 不过我还是会安慰自己的, 毕竟只在这里呆一年, 毕业了我一定飞快地回国! 呵呵.
我发现不管自己的外语学得多好, 我始终还是比较喜欢中国的文化. 我看到有些中国人来这边生活了十几年, 被国外的生活完全同化了, 思想和行为都和这里的人一致了. 但是我觉得我是做不到这样. 我还是喜欢我的祖国, 喜欢祖国的风俗习惯和人文环境. 我可以和老外轻松地交流, 但是我却不能习惯他们的生活方式. 大概我是被中国的思想文化浸润太深了, 难以完全接受另一种文化. 所以, 不管在国外会有多好的发展前景, 我还是会回国的, 毕竟那里才是我真正的家!
Reflection on the IBM Module/Personal Learning
Reflecting on the IBM module as well as personal learning, I would like to detail it by shedding light on various benefits this module has brought to me. All the benefits I mentioned in the following paragraphs will be backed up by hard evidence coming from my diary entries, journal article reviews, deeper understanding of certain issues, etc.
1)        Increased Knowledge.
After a whole semester of IBM studies, I have gained a tremendous amount of new knowledge that I did not learn before. Below are several examples coming from my diary entries to illustrate my new learning:
a)        “I have also learnt two new concepts today, namely low-context culture and high-context culture. In low-context culture, the words used by the speaker explicitly convey the speaker’s message to the listener, while in high-context culture, the words spoken by the speaker may actually convey another hidden meaning that could only be understood by knowing culture clues. Therefore, I can make a conclusion that business behaviors will differ, sometimes even tremendously, in low-context culture and high-context culture. It also leads me to think about my home country, China. After measuring Chinese business behavioral styles and customs, I could draw the conclusion that China is a high-context culture.”
                                   Learning Journal Diary 26/10/2010
b)        “By studying the journal article named “The Paradox of International Talent: Alternative Forms of International Assignments”(Meyskens, M. Von Glinow, M. Werther, W. B and Clarke, L. 2009), I came to know that alternative consignees for expatriation have become increasingly important to IHRM. Getting the right mix of human resource practices applied to international assignments will derive performance of global organizations. I could also learn from the article how to choose the appropriate type of assignment to meet organizational and suggest assignee requirements.”
                                    Learning Journal Diary 02/11/2010
c)        “I’ve got to know the nature of ethics and social responsibility after this session. But more importantly, I have a better understanding of the dilemma between exercising social responsibilities and controlling costs. Many companies consider them to be contradictory, but I hold a different stance. From my perspective, a company that sticks to realizing its social responsibility may increase its costs in the short run, but in the long run, it will help the company win a grand reputation among the masses and therefore increase sales volume that will offset or even far outrun the cost incurred by practising social responsibility.”
                                    Learning Journal Diary 16/11/2010
2)        Increased Ability to Identify and Analyze Issues
By reading the journal articles and participating in group case reviews, I gradually develop the ability to identify and analyze IB issues in certain scenarios. Many concepts and theories in IBM may be the same across the world, but the way to tackle real issues may differ tremendously in different contexts. The ability to pinpoint the problem and address it is critical for IB managers.
“Taking into consideration the case about Pepsi Co., we have attempted to come up with some questions to address to further our understanding. One in particular to consider is how do MNEs convey their messages and products to a particular region while taking culture into account? On top of considering cultural factors, when launching international business in another country, companies must take into consideration the need to diversify marketing strategies and channels. These strategies and channels are tailored according to the local people’s likes and dislikes. As suggested through the case, some try to use the public figures and icons of one particular region to appeal to that unique market.”
                                        Group Case Review 22/10/2010
3)        Increased Ability to Critique
By doing the journal article review, not only do I have a deeper understanding of the articles I have read, but also I learn to critique on the viewpoints argued in the articles. I know to draw on other academic sources which are pertinent to the topic under review and critique the article on both its positives and negatives.
   “First of all, the three preconditions, namely the OLI raised in the paradigm is too absolute. Dunning stresses that only by owning the three advantages at the same time can the company go FDI. Moreover, Dunning further extends the theory from individual company to nations. Therefore, it fails to explain the rapidly growing FDI activities in developing countries that do not own three advantages at the same time, especially those FDI activities in developed countries.”
                                        Journal Article Review 02/10/2010
4)        Increased Ability to Coordinate Different Values
After studying chapter 19 about the international human resources management and discussing the case with my group members, I got to know that a successfully IB manager should know how to manage his subordinates well so as to achieve the goal and strategy of the company. This process involves not only coordinating the benefits among staff, but also coordinating different staff values when the staff comes from different cultural backgrounds. It can be evidenced by Wong’s deeds:
“In the case read, emphasis on autonomous decisions and constructive confrontation ran counter to the Chinese belief in totally obeying superiors and maintaining a harmonious interpersonal relationship. So, how do they incorporate values of the organization to match that of the host country? To tackle this issue, Wong tried to get the best out of each culture and meantime get rid of the negatives respectively. He encouraged his staff to develop a sense of empowerment in accordance with Erie’s emphasis on autonomy while asking them to avoid direct confrontation and maintain a harmonious relationship in accordance with Chinese culture.”
                                        Group Case Review 01/11/2010
5)        Increased Ability to Communicate and Present
It can be best illustrated by the following diary entry:
“After this seminar and presentation, I have vastly promoted my ability to communicate with others and to do a presentation. When discussing the case with my teammates, I was exposed to abundant viewpoints that hadn’t come to my mind before. It has tremendously opened my outlooks. Moreover, when doing the class presentation, due to my sound preparation, I did not take any notes with me and could engage the whole class vividly. It has greatly elevated my self-confidence!”
                                    Learning Journal Diary 09/11/2010
6)        Increased Ability to Make Changes
It can also be best illustrated by the feedbacks of the lecturer on my journal article review and my diary entry:
“As an IB student you need to be able to draw on the literature to support your line of argument. Please insert your references in alphabetical order at the end of the article. There should also be an introduction. The critique must draw on academic source material to support or contest the author’s view or study findings.”
                         Feedbacks on Journal Article Review 28/10/2010
“By getting the feedbacks from the lecturer, I know that a good journal article review should not only be confined to the article itself, but should also relate to more of other relevant literature that could be used to critique on the points in the article I review. Therefore, I decide to make a change of my study modes. Instead of merely reading the articles given by the teacher, I will search for other journal articles in our school library and read extensively. Particularly, I should select carefully some articles that are relevant to the journal article I am going to write a review on and use the pertinent points inside to critique points in the article I review.”
                                    Learning Journal Diary 02/11/2010
7)        Increased Ability to Manage Time
There were a lot of readings both from the textbooks and journal articles every week, and I did not finish everything by simply reading them. Instead, I must read carefully and take notes of the most significant concepts and issues discussed in the readings. Moreover, I must read the session slides before class and answer some questions inside ahead of time. Besides, we still had group meetings on case reviews and seminars and journal article reviews. All these entailed a great amount of time. Therefore, I must know to manage my time efficiently to fulfill all the assignments of IBM module while keeping going on other modules.
Another time management should be conducted in group discussion. After our group seminar presentation, when we were looking back at the whole process of preparation, we realized that we had wasted a lot of time in group meeting. In other words, our group meeting was of low efficiency. It could be evidenced by the following extract:
“Secondly, with regards to our meetings we did not utilize our time well. We spent a lot of time sitting around talking. However it was not productive enough. We should have set out an agenda prior to each meeting with the relevant issues to discuss. This would have prevented such inefficiency. Thirdly, the issue of punctuality posed a problem when people did not show up on time for our proposed meetings. Therefore the meetings could not commence as originally planned which resulted in valuable time being wasted and was also unfair on the remaining members of the team.”
                                     Group Seminar Report 13/11/2010
8)        Increased Ability to Relate Theory to Practice
Many students think that it is hard for us to apply what we have learnt into our work and life. They hold that theories and concepts in the textbooks are isolated from practical life. But I hold a different point of view. Whether a theory or concept is useful or not depends on whether we can use it in a subtle and appropriate way. My point can be evidenced by the following extract:
“By learning chapter 4, I know there will be some cultural problems that should be taken into account when interacting with international businessmen of different cultural backgrounds. But actually it is also the same in my dealing with my friends and classmates who come from different nations in UCD. I become more cautious about my wording when meeting students from different countries and tend to ask them about their taboos and customs to enrich my culture intelligence.”
                                    Learning Journal Diary 26/10/2010

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